I chase my tequila with scotch ciac.

I believe air is one of the noble gases ciac.

I knock on plastic for good luck ciac.

I garnish my vegatables with msg ciac.

Every time I die I am reincarnated as myself ciac.

I'm sorry for what i ate ciac.

I got surgery to make myself fatter ciac.

I'm only out on tuesdays and thursdays ciac.

I published an autobiography at the age of fifteen ciac.

I trained my dog to attack the mail man ciac.

I get eleven points for a strike ciac.

Some I thought of today...

I save Word documents after every letter I type ciac.
My urine is potable ciac. (that helps you, Henry)
I only date girls with grills ciac.
I was a law-abiding citizen for Halloween ciac.

I will just drink your pee if i'm really thirsty ciac.

I dip my oreos in water ciac.

I do keg stands without help ciac.

I only get hard-ons in full elevators ciac. -Drew

I call the cops on my own parties ciac. -Drew

I put bumper stickers all over my ferrari ciac.

I chain smoke while running marathons ciac.