I signal left when I know I'm turning right ciac.

I own every Steven Seagal dvd box set ciac.

I have a negative GPA ciac. -Deidre

I use the comic sans font for everything I type ciac.

I claim every cent of my tips ciac. -Skyler

My hot tub is set to 98.6 degrees ciac.

I ride reverse cowgirl on the mechanical bull ciac.

I start fires under smoke detectors ciac.

I buy all my firewood from Albertsons Ciac.
I sip my wine out of shot glasses Ciac.
I started smoking cigarettes only TO get addicted Ciac.

This is my favorite song ciac.

I put up posters with grade 8 bolts ciac.

I sell food to freegans ciac.

I wrecked my car so I wouldnt have to go to work ciac.

I committed suicide on Survivor ciac.

...and I still won a million dollars.

I built a time machine out of my 1987 Ford Taurus ciac.

My middle name is Caution ciac.

I give out joints on Halloween ciac.

I only smoke cigarette filters ciac.

From Ian

I pee sitting down cause I'm a criminal.

Some I had saved...

I roofie my girlfriend ciac.
I ask homeless people for money ciac. -wt
I break into other people's houses and clean them ciac. -wt
I can drive two cars at a time ciac. -wt
I take my wife to a bachelor party ciac.
(unknown)


I download spyware on purpose ciac.
I have a coke nail on my toe ciac.
I pull cops over ciac.
Will


I get 86'd from Applebee's ciac.
I put the Bible in the fiction section ciac.
Jake

I only listen to vinyl rips ciac.
I drunk dial my mom ciac.
I google Google ciac.
I chase microbrews with Bud Light ciac.
I face my bills before I spend them ciac.
I smoke twenty-FOUR feet from buildings ciac.
I drink white wine from a red wine glass ciac.
I perm my pubes ciac.
I put jarred sauce on homemade pasta ciac.
I read Highlights for the articles ciac.
I only drink grain alcohol and Keystone Light ciac.
I only use prime numbers ciac.
I OD on marijuana ciac.
I put filters on my Lucky Strikes ciac.
My ringtone is MMMBop ciac.
me